Life Lessons

Life Lessons #1

March 24, 2015

1. Your AAA card is more important to carry around with you than your Which Wich card.

There will be times when you go to Which Wich and you forget your stamp card, and then you will be disappointed. But there will be times when your car dies and you don’t have your AAA card on you, and then you will be SCREWED.

2. If the men’s restroom is next to the women’s restroom, always check the sign before entering.
Even if you’ve gone to the same bathroom a thousand times. Because if you push the wrong door open, you will see things you can never un-see. And scream things.

3. Memorize your license plate number.
I remember mine because it sounds like “sex jiggy” when you read it out loud. When you need to fill out a form and don’t want to walk outside to check your car, this is exceptionally helpful.

4. Learn how to be direct without being rude.
People don’t appreciate beating around the bush anyway. Like the man who asked me “did you use to drive a Honda civic?” Dude, if you wanted to know if I’m Vietnamese, just ask (I am).

5. Always bring your own toilet paper.
This one is a special lesson from my mom, who came to visit me and put her own roll in my toilet paper holder.

I hadn’t run out of toilet paper.

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